You want your party to be fun for everyone. You want people to mingle and meet each other. Unfortunately, you have one problem: Some of your party guests are not going to mingle because they are too shy. So how do you get them out of their shells?

First of all, shy people need permission to talk to people. They need to feel invited to interact. It's always good to introduce them to others, but what happens when you leave? They will go right back into themselves. I'm a shy person myself, and when I go to parties I find myself just sitting there. I don't know what to say to anyone. I wish people would come up to me and talk to me. When they do, I hope they will carry the conversation because I sure can't.

I have found that there are two types of parties: The kind where everyone just mingles the whole time, and the kind where the host has arranged for everyone to participate in a fun large group activity or party game. This is the key right here: Set up a party game! I love these because they give me the permission I need to interact with people. They open that door for me.

Let me suggest a party game that really gets people to mingle. I call it the mingling cards game. Each person gets 5 cards, each with a small mingling task written on it, such as "Find someone you have never met and give him/ her a compliment." Everyone is asked to carry out the tasks on all of their cards. Cards not yet completed can be traded. This activity creates a lively vibe that gets everyone going. The downside of this game is that it takes a long time to think of a long list of tasks. You can save time and buy a pre-made mingling cards game at www.minglingcards.com.

Another thing that may help is what I call conversation cards. Since shy people have a hard time thinking of things to talk about, a useful tool for interaction would be a stack of cards with quirky, funny, unusual conversation topics written on them, such as "What would you do if you never needed sleep and never got tired?" A list of such topics can be found at www.contopics.com.

Bottom line: Party games and pre-arranged mingling activities will keep your parties fun for everyone.